Reality kicks in


After such an amazing week, with my birthday and completing the sprint triathlon, I shouldn’t have been surprised that I started to get very, very low. The reality of having cancer was slowly kicking in. Up until now, I had still been in denial - I didn’t really have cancer, I wasn’t really going to have surgery, and chemotherapy was just something I was going through.

Suddenly, I started to feel sorry for myself, and was crying in the shower. Could I not just go to sleep and wake up when everything was over? I did actually see this as a good thing. It had to happen at some point during my treatment, and I was glad it was now and not in six months’ time, when the pressure valve would have a lot more steam to release. Read More…

Run or Dye Tri-ing

I’d made it through the last of the Docetaxel, which was a huge relief. Everyone was telling me that I was half-way through, which was a good thing. But I’ve always been a pessimist, and being half-way just meant that I had to go through it all again. But I tried to put those thoughts behind me, and enjoy the 2 good weeks coming up, as I had a couple of crazy things planned, and a birthday to celebrate :) Read More…

Cycle 3 - tired of being tired


It was another lovely sunny day, that was going to be ruined by my final Docetaxel chemotherapy cycle. I was really dreading this. Although I couldn’t really remember just how bad I was in the bad week of cycle 2, I knew that I didn’t want to have to go there again. Read More…

Going to the Mensroom


The weekend after my night in hospital was spent sleeping and resting and swallowing tablets - something I hate having to do. I was also getting constipated again which made me feel very miserable, so I was also taking 2 sachets of Movicol a day to try and get things moving.

I woke up on the Monday feeling like a different person, and was yet again amazed how I could feel so different overnight. My brain cleared and I had a bit more energy, although I was exhausted after even gentle exercise. I still had incredibly painful hands and very dry, numb skin on my fingertips. Dermot was getting used to being chief opener of any bottle. It was even becoming a struggle to lift the lid on the shower gel. And the altered taste, yes that was also sticking around. Who needs to enjoy food anyway? Read More…
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